Friday, July 4, 2008

TSA To Screen For Terrorist Cats

Responding to the latest threat from extremist terrorist groups, the Transportation Safety Administration will begin to x-ray and inspect all cats carried onto planes. With the new increase in screen procedures inside U.S. airports that insures every grandmother, nun and 5 year old ends up on the terrorist watch list, terrorist have started recruiting cats as suicide bombers.

The terror cats, or extreme felines, generally are recruited by other cats in lower income neighborhood to become radical suicide cats, walking up to the closest group of American dogs, or places where American dogs hang out, and detonating their bombs.

Fearing that a terror cat might by smuggled onto U.S. airlines, the TSA will immediately begin placing the fluffy pets onto the x-ray belt for through inspection. TSA also announced the creation of the terror-cat watch list or (twat list), which will help identify terror cats prior to entry in the U.S., or at a minimum, put more 40 year old suburbanite insurance salesmen on the watch list and subject them to invasive cavity searches.

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